Names

While looking through some boxes of childhood mementos, I came across these 2 sheets of paper with names. I found the boy one first and I instantly knew what it was - the names my parents had come up with had I been a boy. A few minutes later, I found the girl one. I love that they saved these for me to rip on one day .


I'll tackle the boys names first. I know it was really hard for my mom being a teacher to come up with boys names. I'm not surprised to see the name Kevin absent from the list because my mom had always said it was the #1 "bad boy" name. Most of the names are decent and are ones I had considered myself for our child{ren}, especially Andrew {Drew}, Alexander {Xander}, Benjamin, and Wesley {to be used as a middle name.} I think Bradford and Warren are funny for a 1974 baby because those are "so 2000's" to name a child something so distinguished and formal. Same goes with Regan, although I'm glad that they didn't have the chance to use this name on a boy since I can only see it on a girl. I want to gag at some of the nicknames my parents typed out next to the given names: Benjy, Jamie {like it for a girl}, and Nat {where's the "e" on the end - that would have made it better}. Harold, Wally and Toby sound like names that will get you an ass-kicking on a 1980's playground, however, both names are acceptable by today's naming standards. I just can't believe Robin is on the list. I thought my parents were better than that.


On to the girls... This is the list that is so weird to be staring at considering these could have been my fate. I see Jennifer Leigh on here twice... which would have been strange marrying Jason {actress Jennifer Jason Leigh.} I'm glad Ariana didn't make the final handwritten list off to the side, because I can only picture that name on someone Greek with olive skin, brown eyes and dark hair. Barf names: Christel {don't get me started...}, Virginia {va-jay-jay} , Maureen {I have a friend with this name but I'm not a fan... shhh... don't tell her}. I'm surprised to see that my parents have the nickname Shelly next to Rachel, which is my sister's name. I never would have thought it to be a nickname for Rachel, nor have my parents ever dared call her that. Speaking of my sis, her middle name ended up being Ellice {pronounced El-iss}, which my parents "created" by combining my grandmother's names: Alice and Eloise. Rachel - aren't you glad they didn't pin you down with Lois, Luisa, Loise, Loyce, Luan or Elouise? I like Cara, Elissa, Manda and Stacia because they would have been unique {but wouldn't have been singled out as "strange"} back in 1974.

I was always told that my parents went to the hospital pretty convinced I was a boy but came armed with a few girls names {just in case!} and that the front-runner was Meredith. Then when I was born and had dark hair, my mom said I didn't look like a "Meredith" because all Meredith's were blond {?!?!?!} Then in 1979 when my cousin Meredith was born as a blond, my parents agreed "now she's a 'Meredith'!" What I find funny is that parents can look at a mushed-up, red-faced, cone-headed, cross-eyed 1 hour old baby and know exactly what their name should or shouldn't be. I guess I just don't "get that" since we never had to go through it.

With our first referral, we were FedEx'd a few xerox'd photos of a 9-month old boy with brown eyes and brown hair who had a name but we'd never know it unless we approved the referral. Even once we found out, we could opt to change the name if the Russian government OK'd it. Up until the day we received his pictures, our choices for a boy were Ben or Jake. When his packet arrived at our doorstep and he was so dark, we went back to the drawing board of names {because apparently all Ben's and Jake's are blond, just like Meredith's} We sat at a restaurant with his picture staring back at us and came up with Calvin {Cal}, Andrew {Drew}, Oliver and Charles {Charlie}. A few days later when we approved the referral, we were told his name was Yan {John} and that was the first time it occurred to us that this child had an identity. Since we weren't fans of the name, but felt compelled to use it, we pushed it to a middle name and decided on Andrew Yan Lewis. Of course nothing was going to be a done deal until we had the child home on US soil.

Then in September, we lost that referral and were emailed pictures of another little boy - this time twice the age of Yan. We were looking at an 18-month old blond boy and my first thought was "Yeah! I get my name 'Ben' back!" But then the strangest thing happened. When we approved the referral and found out his name was Roman. Wow. This little guy had such a big name. And we liked it! It never would have made our top 50, but we were staring at his little blue eyes and the smirk on his face and it was the only name for him. We never did decide on a middle name - perhaps we were reserved from losing that first referral that we thought if we made too many plans we'd lose this little guy, too.

In fact we never spoke of a middle name until it was almost too late. We were sitting in a cab in St. Petersburg on our way to court and Irena {our advocate for the agency} was going over what to expect in the hearing. She was telling what to say, what not to say, etc... and she casually asked "have you decided on a name?" We told her that we were keeping "Roman" and she asked "what about the middle name?" We told her we hadn't discussed it yet and she basically told us that we'd be at the courthouse in 10 minutes and that we'd need to decide by then. We were dumb-founded and instantly our brains were stripped of names. We didn't have the luxury of a baby names book, we didn't even have a pad of paper and pen to doodle, draw out monograms, see how the names looked in writing, etc... We just sat there rambling names like: "Roman Bowman", "Roman Poman" Roman Polanski", "Roman Brady", "Roman Numeral", "Roman Army". {I may mention that we were deliriously tired and slap-happy, if you can't tell by our name choices} Then at crunch-time, we revisited "Benjamin" but didn't like it with Roman, so we started in our family names: Davis, Jay, Glenn, Morgan, etc... and finally decided on Daniel, which is Jason's middle name. We told Irena and she wrote it down as we pulled up to the courthouse. I don't know who named Roman - his birth-mother or the maternity nurses, but his name is perfect. And I love that he has his daddy's middle name.